I get it. We want to be everything to everyone that we love, even if it is at the expense of us sacrificing our rest, time alone, time to kick back and just laugh, etc. There's always just "one" more thing to do before we can finally kick our shoes off and really relax. We have somehow been able to balance out the world and make sure everyone is "okay" (or so we think). But how do we know when we are indeed worn out with the daily pressures of work, family, school, etc. and need to take some time out for ourselves without feeling guilty? Let's face it-being "busy" is sometimes worn as a badge of honor and makes us feel "needed." However, the reality of that mindset is that being "busy" to the point of our own demise can leave us feeling more insufficient than we would be if we took a moment to STOP and allow ourselves to just......BE. Even if just for a moment.
A few weeks ago I was having a conversation with someone about how some of the "projects" that I had been working on either were on pause or were slowing down. The issue that I was having was that I felt guilty for having some "down time" for a change. I felt like I was wasting time to take a moment to kick back and watch mindless television (hehe), to take a stroll through the mall (without buying anything, HA!), or to call a friend that I hadn't spoken to in a while and catch up on life. I had become so accustomed to feeling overwhelmed and always "busy" that I actually thought that to be otherwise was a "waste of time." Imagine that! The irony of it all is that in moments when I am extremely busy, I wish I had a moment to kick back and do nothing. See how that works?
To avoid feeling anxious about not feeling overwhelmed (I know, I know...), I had to renew my thoughts concerning the ability to rest and to do things that I actually enjoy without feeling guilty. I had to understand that I am most useful when I am able to pour into myself just as much as I am willing to pour into others. I had to relinquish the mindset that I am at my best when I am overwhelmed with things to do. And I had to tell myself that it is OKAY to take a moment to care for ME. And its possible to do that and remain on tasks with my goals! Go figure! :)
I have developed some practical tips on how you can join me on this journey of still keep the Earth in balance (smile) while still have some healthy self-care:
1) Actually set aside some time for self-care. Just like the time you go to bed, the time you wake up, what time dinner is made, etc. are all given a specific time frame in your week, also intentionally schedule time for self-care.
2) Decide what makes you feel relaxed. It could be as simple as taking a walk in the park, prayer/meditation, journaling, a massage, etc. This will be time that you take for YOU Even if it is just an hour, this hour can mean the difference between you being able to get through the next week without anxiety or completely feeling overwhelmed during the next week.
3) Take some time to notice how you are feeling mentally and emotionally. Are you anxious? Are you still thinking of your "to-do" list even as you are supposed to be having some self care? Are you afraid that taking a break from tasks to enjoy yourself will result in things falling apart? Trust me, they won't:)
4) Relinquish the GUILT! Purposely trash any thoughts that make you feel guilty for making sure that you are mentally and emotionally harmonious so that you can be a blessing to those around you. The world won't fall apart because you for a moment think of yourself. And guess what? If it does then that means you are God and that is a whooooole other blog conversation (LOL!!).
Take Care,
Brandy Shavon, Pearls of Esther, Inc.